Being in public- 

What is it about being out in public that make us nervous or anxious?  Is the fear of judgement? The fear of crowds (Agrophobic)?  Or is just the fact there people that are absolute jerks with attitudes and they think the world owes something and they are unwilling to change their situation.  For a trans person or any member of the LGBTQ plus community it is the fear of judgement, it is the fear of violence, it is the fear of being called discovered.  Despite the fact that some views are changing especially among the churches there are others that cling to Edwardian ideas of life.  Men don't show emotion, women stay home and take care of children, you wear your Sunday best to church, the list goes on.  

Why is it one day we can get a compliment that is the highlight of the week and yet the next day someone says something that can ruin our entire perspective on life and destroy our self-confidence.  My wife and I have had this coversation many times. Last night for example, we went out to dinner and mentioned something that was loud enough for everyone to hear or at least I thought it was.  Needless to say my confidence went down and I felt very self conscience afterword and yes there was some arguing and to some degree my feeling were dismissed.  She assumes that I don't things like material stretches or how to dress and there again the list goes on, she likes to be the smartest person in the room and forgets that I am not her ex-husband or an ex-boyfriend that was a cop, military type person.  I am an educated well spoken free thinking individual who has issues with authority hence one of the reasons I didn't join the military and the fact that I am a smart ass and would have told people off.  

So what is about being in public?  Human Beings are designed to be social creatures, we for the most part feel a need to be around others.  Sometimes it is looking acceptance, sometimes a shoulder to cry on, companionship, people to celebrate lifes up's and down's, weekend cookouts and many more activities.  It is the idea of not being alone, feeling part of something.  We human's categorize ideas and concepts we do not understand but no one person fits into any one category- parent/child, son/daughter, bother/sister, neice, nephew, aunt, unlce, friend, co-worker, husband/wife, teacher/student, gay/queer/homosexual/lesbian, Trans (transgender/transvestite/crossdresser)...or how about the types of relationships we live- polyarmous, monogamous, open, asexual, friends with benefits.  These ideas are not limited to what is listed but the idea is there that one overall idea defines who we are, character.  We get to decide who we are what we want be, that is what being in public is about defining who we are not society not some psychological babel with lots of terms because we as humans are so much more.  I am a guy who presents as a woman though not always and I have come to accept this of myself and it is just one aspect of who I am it does not define me, I define it.  I am also a black belt in Karate who likes the outdoors, music, movies, etc...these are personality traits, each bit is part of the same person and my character is how I conduct myself as a whole of these bits- Strength of Character.  Do we let the public crush us or...do we meet the public head on.